Senior of The Month: Sydney Dolan

This month's senior of the month is Sydney Dolan. Sydney enjoys model rocketry, drawing, and watching Rupaul's Drag Race. She has taken AP Literature and AP Language, and her specialty is research papers and Munson essays. Come see her slaving over the blog at the Writing Center during 6th period!

Sydney is clearly at the Writing Center in this photo.

Stephen's Love Advice: Promposals

Dear Stephen,

I don't know how to ask a girl that I like out to prom. Do you have any ideas or advice?

From, Lovestruck Loser

Here are some of my best ideas.

• Dress up as Winnie the Pooh and say "I'm Winnie the Pooh. Prom?"
• Let's have one hellUVA time
• (For a girl name Lynn) I would be Lynnsane not to go with you
• Dress up as a burrito and say "Prom would be Rice"
• I'll treat you better than the CVHS girl's bathroom
• You're more exciting than my honey sandwiches
• Let's make bird calls together.
• Tic-Tac-Toe. Give me an X. Give me an O. Come to Prom?
• *Falls from second floor to first floor* "I literally just fell for you. Prom?"
• "P is for prom and P is for perfection, go to prom with me and I'll show all my affection!"
• P is for prom not for PF Changs, go with me and you'll end up saying "DAAAANG"
• Hey are you a geek  because your eyebrows are on FLEEK. Prom? 

 Sincerely,                      

Swag Daddy Steve

7000 Page Views!

   Things are going great for the Writing Center! AP week is over, the blog has over 7,000 views, and there has been a steady flow of students coming in. Now to spread the joy, we have compiled a list of  jokes. We hope that you can get a laugh out of these.

I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.

Why don't blind people skydive?

Because it scares the hell out of their dogs

Crazy ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolates. They'll kill your dog.

What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.

I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the Toronto zoo.

I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.
It was pretty bad at first, but, by the end, I liked it.

What do you call a friendship between punctuation marks?

Commaraderie.

If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner for a bit.

They're usually around 90 degrees.

There are two monkeys in a bath tub.

One says to another: oohoohahah!

The other says: Maybe add a little more cold water.

Why does Snoop Dogg always carry an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

Say what you want about deaf people.

I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but I turned myself around.

What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale

English Writing Tips Masterpost

English is a very complicated language, and there are a lot of rules that one has to keep in mind when writing. Here we've compiled a series of graphs and diagrams to help you differentiate all the rules.

This website breaks down body language, and what certain postures and movements mean. This is very helpful if you are writing a story and looking to accurately portray a character's mood.

The Purdue Online Writing Lab (OWL)  has many pages upon pages dedicated to citing, formatting, or even grammatical questions. If you are writing a research paper, the Purdue OWL is a reputable source to consult.

Ever have a word that you want to use, but you can't seem to remember it? This website is here to help. The website takes hints about the word that you are trying to remember, and then offers you a list of options for the word that you are looking for.

Stuck on a name for a character? This website will give you a random name. You can even chose the ethnicity, gender, and surname of the name you are looking for.

Teacher Appreciation Week

We asked our tutors to tell us about their favorite teacher. Here are a few of their responses.

Sara Khorramshagol

I have many favorite teachers, basically all my teachers that I have had in the past are my favorite. But the one that I've made a close connection with is my sophomore history teacher, Mrs. Beckmann.

I found Mrs. Beckmann to be the teacher that could tolerate my weirdness and craziness. I found her to also be very talented and knowledgeable about World History. Mrs. Beckmann made me love World History. Out of all the subjects in school, World History is one of my all time favorite classes. In Mrs. Beckmanns class I felt comfortable and always wanted to participate, and was actually motivated to do my work. I would always study and put my 100% effort.

Mrs. Beckmann really helped me retain the information. Whenever she could, she would try to connect the info to the real world. She mentioned to the class about I am Malala and I was very interested to read it. I am so inspired to learn more from Mrs. Beckmann.

Alison Gomeiz

In an age where people are overly sensitive, its nice to have a cathartic release from the tension going into his class every 3rd period. His sharp attitude cuts through the fluff of our society and pouts the facts in black and white terms, taking out the "mush" and grey area. Although I discuss with him a lot on policies, we respect the others' opinion. He pushes me to be a better student and his teaching will continue to affect me for the rest of my student career and possibly beyond. He's unorthodox, but he has taught me so much in such a different style of teaching. I wish each student could experience being in a classroom with Mr. O'Rourke.

May Writing Center Horoscopes

• Aries (March 21- April 19)Due to the sun's conflicting position with the Earth, your inner chi is off. Channel you inner namaste in order to resolve conflicting thoughts.                    
• Taurus (April 20- May 20)The collision between Pluto and the sun this month will result in a tumultuous few weeks for you, Taurus. Be sure to take cover from any debris from Pluto.
• Gemini (May 21- June 20)  Venus is in line with Mars this month which means the flowers will be growing in your direction. The flowers will sprinkle pollen on your head, causing severe allergies.           
• Cancer (June 21- July 22)                                                                                              A shooting star will fly across the sky, sprinkling good fortune onto your house. Do not be surprised if you stumble across a $20 bill in your future endeavors.
• Leo (July 23- August 22)A ladybug crosses your line of sight. In order to figure out your future AP Exam score, count the dots on this ladybug. The number of  dots will be reflective of your score.Yes, you can get a 7,Leo.
• Virgo (August 23- September 22)Remember to take time out of your day and smile to appreciate the little things. Happiness is the secret to beauty in life. At least, that's what you tell yourself after the plastic surgery fell through.
• Libra (September 23- October 22)The half moon on the 6th will cast a shadow into your relationship, meaning you will get yourself into some friend drama.         
• Scorpio (October 23- November 22)                                                                            Wow look in the mirror, what do you see? Someone who needs to get their life together. This is a wake up sign, literally.
• Sagittarius (November 22- December 21)As you attempt to overcome struggles in your daily life, look to your family. They are the source of all problems.
• Capricorn (December 22- January 19)Life is about priorities. Focus on what you hold dear. Like your appendages. Those are very important.
• Aquarius (January 20- February 18)Keep away from people that belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that. And not just the midgets.
• Pisces (February 19- March 20)                                                                                 The Stars are in your favor as you find new love in an unexpected area. Pray to cupid that your romantic interest doesn't have a disease this time.                                          

* Horoscope Image credit goes to The Onion.